


Invincible

by Nebulash



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Homophobic Language, M/M, Physical Abuse, but has a bunch of flashbacks to canonverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-26
Updated: 2013-09-26
Packaged: 2017-12-27 15:47:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/980742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nebulash/pseuds/Nebulash
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s on the way to his least favorite class, environmental science, that he runs smack dab into an innocent bystander. Jean isn’t really one to apologize, but he occasionally knows when he’s in the wrong, and the innocent bystander’s freckles stir something inside of him that he can’t exactly place.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Invincible

**Author's Note:**

> Hello folks, first Jeanmarco fic here.  
> Flashbacks are in italics.  
> Enjoy!

It’s on the way to his least favorite class, environmental science, that he runs smack dab into an innocent bystander. Jean isn’t really one to apologize, but he occasionally knows when he’s in the wrong, and the innocent bystander’s freckles stir something inside of him that he can’t exactly place. He takes a step back, bending forward slightly and offering his hand to the taller boy, who had fallen backwards and onto his bottom post-collision. “Sorry” Jean mumbles, his heart rate quickening inexplicably as he gently helps the other boy to his feet.  The boy is rather cute, though Jean punches himself internally for thinking so, and for a split second he’s sure they’ve met somewhere before.

 

“No worries, I should have been looking where I was going” The dark haired boy smiles sweetly, dusting himself off before slinging his backpack over his shoulder. His gaze catches on the book in Jean’s hand, “Ah, environmental science? I’m actually on my way there, I left my book in the car so I was running back to get it.” Jean nods. He’s been attending college for nearly a year now, and he’d still managed to avoid making friends with anyone. In class he took notes and if he wasn’t preoccupied with school, he used that time to sleep. But now he had a choice. To follow the boy or to leave him in the dust?

  
“Come with me.” The boy said, the combination of freckles and smile sending a shiver up Jeans spine. If they had class together, surely that’s the cause of the intense deja vu he was currently experiencing. Jean shrugged his shoulders, “Fine, I guess. If the professor gives us a hard time for being late, I’ll let you explain.”

 

The boy just simply smiles, shaking his head before walking in the direction of his car, “I’m Marco by the way. I’m sort of glad I’ve run into you. Environmental science is hard and I could probably use some motivation for going to class. That class is big, it’s hard to make friends.”

 

“Jean.” the blonde responded, pushing away another blast of familiarity as Marco introduced himself. “It’s nice to meet you Marco. It is hard...to make friends.”

 

_His body was sore and tired and he was pretty sure the second his head hit the pillow he’d be fast asleep. But things didn’t usually go the way Jean pictured them, and hours later he was still lying awake. With a huff he turned on his side._

_“Can’t sleep either?” came a gentle voice from the next bed over. Marco was awake too. “Want to go for a walk? No point in laying here wide awake for another hour or two, right?”_

_Jean blinked up at the boy next to him. He’d kept his distance from the other recruits, a little afraid of getting too close to anyone in such a dangerous environment. In a world where people lost their lives almost daily, it was only normal to try and stay away. But he felt a hand on his shoulder, and though the room was rather dark, he could still make out the loving smile on Marco’s face. How could he say no to that? “Yeah…” he muttered. “I guess a walk sounds nice.”_

_And so they began the first walk in what would become a ritual. One that they would fulfill every night one of them couldn’t sleep, which was more often than either of them would like to admit. Nightmares plagued both their dreams, and Jean found that talking to Marco somehow made everything a little bit better._

_Marco had Jean figured out the second he’d laid eyes on him, and it wasn’t really a bad thing. He’d always found it reasonably easy to read people, and his squad mate was no exception. He was a typical tough guy, yet somehow so much more. That temper and passion made Marco blush, and though he tried his hardest to hide the crush he was starting develop on the other boy, it was hard to keep a secret. He felt his cheeks heat up at just the thought of a relationship with Jean as they walked side by side away from the sleeping quarters and out onto the training grounds._

_“I’m really looking forward to serving the king in the Military Police with you Jean.” Marco said softly as he kept pace with the other boy. “It’s been a dream of mine for so long.” He paused his steps, only to take a seat against the ground. Jean looked down at him and did the same, sitting at a comfortable distance from the other._

_“Yeah” he sighed, “It’ll be good. Looking forward to it too, Marco.”_

 

Jean’s eyes snapped open and scanned the room. When had he fallen asleep? and where the hell was he? As the world fell into place piece by piece, he noticed that his head was resting comfortably on the shoulder of the person next to him.

 

“Good Morning.” Marco whispered quietly, smiling at his still-half-asleep company. It was then that Jean remembered.

 

He had literally run into Marco on his way to class, and must have fallen asleep in the middle of lecture. The strange dream he had been having was long forgotten now, as he sat upright in his chair, his cheeks burning with embarrassment. Had he really been that tired? And why had Marco let him use him as a pillow, they had literally only just met.

 

“I would have woken you up, but you looked so comfortable. Only one of us needs to take notes after all.” Marco continued, motioning to the page of neatly-written notes in his lap. Jean bit his bottom lip, nodding gently before turning his attention to the professor. Class was coming to a close and the lecture hall began buzzing with movement and energy as the students began to pack up their belongings. “Test next class, come prepared.” Jean heard the Professor shout over the commotion.

 

“Test next class and only one of us has the review notes.” Marco said as he unzipped his backpack and placed his notebook inside. Jean watched him carefully. Everything he did was so neat and orderly, the blonde wasn’t entirely sure his new friend would be able to put up with him for very long. Jean didn’t care whether something was messy or clean, as long as he could find whatever he was looking for, he was perfectly happy.

 

“I guess we’ll have to study together. Just a bit of warning though, I’m a pretty horrible at studying. I don’t have much of an attention span.” Jean finished Marco’s thought, standing up and slinging his backpack over one shoulder.

 

“Oh we’ll see, I’m sure you’re just selling yourself short.” And he smiled that smile again, the one that made Jean’s stomach do a flip. So familiar, and so frustrating that this whole situation seemed to be pulling on Jean’s memories in a confusing little haze. He turned on his heel and headed out of the lecture hall, hoping that Marco wouldn’t notice the blush on his cheeks. That smile just did strange things to him.

 

It was there that they went their separate ways, after exchanging numbers of course.  They would meet at the library tomorrow evening in order to study for the test, but Marco had insisted on giving Jean his number just in case there was an issue.

* * *

Marco tried his hardest not to wince as he reached for the library door and pulled it open. If his father had just aimed the punch a bit lower, maybe it wouldn’t be in such a problematic spot. His whole body was battered and bruised, covered by long pants and a sweater in order to avoid unwanted questions. This was nothing new for the boy. He’d been hiding bruises for quite a while now, and had experienced the odd looks and questions people often gave him when he failed at hiding them properly. He thanked his lucky stars that his father had avoided his neck and face this time. Marco didn’t want Jean to find out just how pathetic his was.

 

Jean seemed confident and brave, passionate and strong - he was everything Marco wished that he could be. Sometimes Marco would have a streak of courage, but his father was usually pretty quick to knock that out of him. Regardless, Marco had slumped out of bed that morning with Jean in his mind’s eye, the excitement of spending some time with his new friend enough to make the pain in his body a bit more manageable.

 

The dark haired boy walked into the libraries’ main floor where tables with other studying students scattered the area. Jean was sitting at a table in the corner of the building, his chin resting on his palm as he scrolled absentmindedly through his phone. It brought a smile to Marco’s face. The other boy was pretty cute, though he’d never tell him outright. Jean seemed pretty straight and though it was new, Marco cherished their friendship more than he was willing to chance screwing it all up. He made his way over to the table and took a seat next to Jean, smiling the brightest smile he could muster as the pain shot up his back.

 

“Hello there study buddy” he said, unzipping his backpack and pulling out his notes, “I made a copy of these for you, just in case you want to study on your own later.”

 

Jean smiled at his friend, oddly touched at the gesture. Nobody had ever helped him study like this, and it usually resulted in average to poor grades on Jean’s end. He excelled naturally in some classes and did poorly in others, which led him to be quite passive in his studies. He depended on the classes he was a natural in to balance out those where he was not.

 

“Thanks Marco, you’re a pal.” He said with a smile, taking the photocopied notes and admiring Marco’s neat handwriting for a moment, “With you around, I might actually start to pass these stupid tests.”

 

Marco’s stomach felt a little topsy turvy when he met Jean’s eyes. The other boys harsh features gave him such a handsome smile, and it made the dark haired boy nervous. He was falling so quickly for Jean, and he didn’t understand why. Marco knew to keep his heart guarded. Though he was a reasonably friendly person, he very rarely let people actually get close to him. He preferred to be acquaintances with many people rather than close friends with a few. It led to less heartbreak at the end of the day, but Jean was slowly starting to break through his defenses. The boy had managed to claw his way under Marco’s skin, and the freckled boy wasn’t so sure he minded. Marco cleared his throat, shattering his train of thought and focusing on the task at hand.

 

“Sorry for falling asleep on you the other day, I’m not really sure what came over me. I’m quite a night owl, I probably wasn’t getting enough sleep. Obviously” Apologies weren’t something Jean was fond of, but with how sweet Marco had been to him recently, he felt his new friend was due one.

 

“Oh, don’t worry about it. I’m glad you were comfortable enough to snooze, especially if you were tired and needed it.” Marco responded, another kind smile gracing his features. “It happens to the best of us. I was happy to take notes for you anyway.” and it was an excuse to get to see you again his mind added, but he kept that inside. “Let’s get started, eh?”

 

Jean nodded, and their study session began. Marco leading his way through the review, and Jean admiring his how cute the other boy was when he was having trouble remembering the answer to one of the review questions. The way his brow would furrow or the way he’d chew on his bottom lip as he searched his brain for the information. Jean’s mind wandered a bit as Marco began to explain one of the processes they would need to know tomorrow - pinning the other boy up against a bookshelf and crushing his lips to Marco’s.

 

“Jean?” Marco asked, snapping Jean back into reality.

 

“O-Oh sorry, what was it again? I got a little distracted.” he felt his cheeks heat up in embarrassment. Why had he been thinking of something like that?

 

“Ah, I was just asking if you wanted me to repeat the water cycle for you, but I guess you didn’t hear it in the first place.” Marco smiled again. That stupid smile that made Jean a bit weak in the knees. It made him feel strange. Maybe he was just tired, that had to be it. Strange things did tend to fill a tired mind, and it had been quite a long day.

 

“Yeah I’m just...sorry Marco. I should probably get going, I don’t think I can focus well enough to get anything done anymore.”

 

“Oh, okay, I understand.” Marco replied, pushing away the small pang of disappointment he felt in his chest. He knew he couldn’t go home yet, and had planned to stay at the library until class in the morning. Deep down, he was hoping that Jean might be able to stay for a bit longer, but obviously that wasn’t the case.

 

“You should probably go home and get some sleep too, no? It’s already pretty late, if you’re tired for the test, you won’t do as well.” Jean spoke as he packed up his things, placing the notes Marco had gave him carefully in a binder and sliding it into his backpack.

 

“Yeah...I guess I should.” Marco lied, trying to keep his tone as positive as possible but failing quite miserably. Jean noticed and felt a bit guilty. He could probably stay much longer, but with his mind wandering to such perverse things he needed to get away. His thoughts were just plain wrong, and being around Marco wasn’t exactly helping.

 

“Hey, how about you come over to my place sometime? We can play video games, maybe I’ll get some beer or something.” Jean shifted nervously, looking at Marco, whose face visibly lit up with excitement at the question.

 

“I would absolutely love that” Marco replied, his smile earnest and kind. The chance to hang out with Jean in a situation that didn’t involve school was exactly what he wanted. He hardly ever hung out with friends in his spare time, using his extra time on campus to focus on his studies. He had to get good grades and graduate at the top of the class. He had to get away from this town and his awful father. “I’ll walk you home...if you’d like some company. A break from studying might be good.” he hoped that he wasn’t being annoying.

 

Jean wasn’t sure why he said yes, especially since his main goal in going home was to get away from Marco, but he just couldn’t fight how much he wanted to spend time with the other boy regardless of his perverted thoughts. So he nodded, sliding a hand through his hair before helping Marco pack up his belongings.

 

They left the building, walking side by side into the fresh nighttime air. Both boys found comfort in the silence between them as they walked down the dark campus sidewalk. It was rare to find someone that Jean could be completely comfortable around. He’d often found his competitive nature to get in the way of friendships, and people in general annoyed him. But not Marco, not at all. The freckled boy was sweet and Jean found himself genuinely glad to have met him. Not only would the other boys help increase Jean’s success in his studies, but in Marco’s company, Jean found himself pretty happy for one of the first times in a long time

 

“This is me” Jean said as they walked up to the small apartment complex that he called home. He lived alone in a small one bedroom apartment just off campus. Marco envied him. What it must be like to live alone. How nice it must be to always be able to go home and know you don’t have a punch in the gut waiting to greet you. How he wished he could stay with Jean for the night, even if it meant sleeping on the couch. He thought of asking but felt that he might be pushing his luck with the other boy. Jean seemed like the type of guy that appreciated alone time, and Marco didn’t want to take that away from him.

 

“Thanks for a fun night Jean.” Marco said with a smile, nervously fiddling with the strap of his backpack, “I’ll see you in class tomorrow, okay? I’ll save you a seat.

 

Jean nodded thankfully, gently placing a hand on Marco’s shoulder and giving him a friendly squeeze, “See you tomorrow Marco, go home and get some sleep, you look a little tired.”

 

Marco couldn’t help but blush at the gesture, resisting the urge to place his hand on top of Jean’s, which was still resting on his shoulder. It hurt a bit, from where his father had slammed him against the wall, but he sort of liked it. It was Jean touching him, and that made him feel alive. He looked tired? Great. He felt tired and was sure he had bags under his eyes. Last night had been rough and he hadn’t been able to get much sleep through the pain on his body. It was hard to nod off when every part of you seemed to scream in pain. “Will do Jean, sleep well okay?”

 

“Same to you,”Jean nodded again, this time with a smile before he turned away from Marco and walked up to his door, unlocking it quickly and stepping inside. It was then that he realized just how fast his heart was beating. Why did Marco affect him so much?

 

He immediately went into the bathroom to begin getting ready for bed, brushing his teeth and stripping down into his boxers before curling up underneath his comforter. Tests never made him nervous, but now with Marco helping him study he wanted to do well. He didn’t want his friend’s efforts to be in vain. He wanted to be the Jean that Marco somehow saw in him.

 

Marco returned to the library, finding a chair in the very back of the building and curling up. It wasn’t the most comfortable bed in the world, but he knew he was safe there, and that meant everything. He fell asleep to the picture of Jean’s face, smiling in his mind.

 

_“Jean! Jean come back!” Marco shouted as he ran towards the other boy. Jean was angry, and as scary as that was Marco wanted to help._

_“Fuck off Marco, I don’t want to talk.” Jean huffed as he continued to storm away, his eyes focused on the horizon._

_“Scores don’t mean anything Jean, you know that. It just means you can do better next time.”_

_“I let that stupid asshole Eren beat me.” Jean growled, “I’m fucking useless at everything and I’m just tired of being reminded of that.”_

_“Don’t be silly Jean, you’re wonderful. You had one of the highest scores. So what if Eren beat you? You’ll just have to beat him next time.”_

_and that’s when Jean turned to face the other boy, grabbing him by the shoulders and slamming him forcefully into the wall. Marco didn’t have time to react, a small whimper of pain escaping his lips as his body hit the wall. Jean was strong, and even stronger when he had anger as motivation. Marco sunk into a sitting position against the wall, cradling his shoulder in pain, his face a mixture of betrayal and hurt._

_Jean realized what he had done, immediately snapping out of his rage and falling to his knees beside Marco, “O-Oh god Marco. I’m so sorry.” He bowed his head, tears finally breaking through his tough demeanor as he began to sob, “I-I’m just pathetic, I don’t deserve a friend like you. I’m so fucking sorry. I can’t fight as well as I should, I can’t beat fucking Eren, I can’t do anything worthwhile. I can’t even treat you right.”_

_Marco gently shook his head. His shoulder throbbed, but Jean was obviously in much more emotional pain than he had realized. He reached out to cup his friend’s face with both his hand, lifting gently so that Jean was forced to look into his eyes. “You’re absolutely wonderful Jean, no matter what your score says or who is supposedly better than you. Not everything can be measured in numbers, and I truly think you’re amazing. Doesn’t that mean something?”_

_Tears slowly fell from Jean’s eyes as he stared at Marco. His forgiving, caring, loving best friend, who somehow always knew how to make him feel better. Even if he felt he wasn’t worthy, Marco thought he was, and that meant the world to him. He let out a soft sigh before pulling Marco into a careful hug, pressing his face into the other’s shoulder. “Thank you Marco...thank you for not giving up on me, thank you for believing in me.”_

_The dark haired boy wrapped his arms around Jean, hugging him back. He moved one hand to Jean’s hair where he stroked soothingly, trying his hardest to love all of the pain and anger away. “ You don’t have to thank me, Jean. Though I prefer hugs to shoves - for future reference.” Marco said softly, earning a tighter hug from Jean._

_“You’ll be getting a lot more hugs from now on then, hope you realize that.”_

_Marco smiled, pressing into the hug a bit more, “I would like nothing more”_

* * *

 

After the test, the days past pretty uneventfully. Marco hadn’t been in class the next day, causing Jean to worry a bit, but he quickly caught himself. Marco had his own life, he was probably busy with something more important, but Jean couldn’t help but wonder what that might be. What could be more important than coming to class with me? He thought with a huff. He took notes for his absent friend, trying his best to make up for the favor the other had shown him before the test.

 

Jean went home after class, flopping down on his couch and turning on the television. For a moment, he thought about texting Marco, asking if he was alright. Skipping class really didn’t seem like something Marco would do, but how would Jean really know? He’d only known the other boy for a couple of days, not really enough time to understand habits like class attendance, but Jean still felt like something was a little off.

 

He grabbed his phone anyway, pulling up an empty text message and inserting Marco’s number into the recipient space. He’d promised Marco a night of videogames and beer at his place. At worst it was an excuse to text the other boy just to make sure he was alright, and hopefully a night of fun could emerge from it as well.

 

>>Hey, missed u in class today. Wanna come over for video game night?

 

Marco was ill and currently buried under a thick layer of blankets. His father had done a number on him when he had walked into his house, beyond angry that the boy hadn’t come home for the night. As much as it saddened him, his body was too abused and broken to make it to class. He couldn’t walk without taking it extremely slowly and knew his injuries would arouse suspicion. So he had stayed home and cotton comfortable, downing a couple of painkillers before trying to get a bit of rest.

 

He had taken his phone under the blankets with him and felt it buzz from somewhere on the bed. For a moment he thought about letting whatever message remain unread, but remembered that he had given his number to Jean. With a groan he sat up, padding through the blankets to retrieve his missing phone. When he finally found it he wasn’t disappointed.

 

The freckled boy’s cheeks flushed as he read the message once and then twice again for good measure. Jean had missed him, and that meant the world to him. Nobody ever missed him. He was just a face in the background that could come and go without much care, but not anymore. Jean missed him and wanted to see him, if only he wasn’t so bashed up. Marco sighed softly as he began his reply. It was Thursday, and by the weekend his injuries should have subsided enough to be able to enjoy himself. He’d ask Jean if they could plan their video game night for the weekend, hopefully he’d say yes.

 

>> I missed you too. Not feeling well. How about this weekend? I’d like to see you.

 

<<Saturday at 7, how’s that sound.  I hope u feel better.

 

>>Sounds perfect, see you then.

 

* * *

 

Jean wasn’t really sure why he spent all day cleaning his apartment in preparation for Marco’s visit. If any of his other friends came over, he’d expect them to deal with whatever messy state the apartment was in - but not for Marco. He was different, he expected things, and for whatever dumb reason, he found Jean so much more amazing than he really felt he was.  

 

With a 12 pack of beer in the fridge, Jean was pretty sure that the night would be a good one. Marco didn’t really seem like the type to get crazy on a saturday night, causing Jean to be a little excited to see how the other boy would react.

 

Marco in the meantime, had used all day Friday to catch up on sleep. He was feeling marginally better by Saturday morning and was beyond excited to see Jean again. He’d really missed the other boy even though it had only been a couple of days. His self worth had been shattered once again by his father, and he badly needed Jean to help put him back together.

 

He stood in front of the mirror for quite awhile before stepping in the shower, surveying the bruises that scattered his body, some on his arms, some on his shoulders, a large one on his hip where his father had pushed him into the corner of the table. How ugly, he thought. How ugly his body was. How stupid he felt for thinking for even a moment that Jean might want him as more than a friend. How could anyone love him when he looked like this?

 

The battered boy dressed himself in long sleeves and pants once again and combed his hair into neatness before grabbing his backpack and heading out the door. Deep down, he wished he could tell Jean everything. He wanted Jean to hold him, to kiss his bruises, to make it better. Marco knew that Jean would be the only one that really could make it better. When he was with the other boy, he never once thought about his personal issues at home. Jean made him feel like a person when his father would make him feel like trash.

 

Marco arrived at Jean’s apartment at 7 on the dot, just as they had planned. Jean opened his door with a grin, stepping back into his apartment and welcoming his friend inside.

 

“Make yourself at home, it’s not usually this clean so enjoy it while it lasts.”

 

Marco smiled, stepping into the small apartment and placing his bag by the door. Jean closed the door behind him, walking over to the fridge and picking out two beers before handing one to Marco. “Here you go, I’ve set up the Gamecube. I know it’s hella old but we can play Mario Kart or something, or if you’re not in the mood for games we could just watch something.”

 

The dark-haired boy took the beer from Jean. He wasn’t usually one to drink, but this was a special occasion, and after the stress from the past couple of days he welcomed the escape a bit of alcohol would bring. He popped open the can and took a sip, hoping he wouldn’t be too much of a lightweight. Embarrassing himself in front of Jean would not be good.

 

Jean did the same, plopping down onto his couch and setting aside a controller for Marco. The other boy took a seat next to him, setting his beer on the table before taking the controller in his hands. He flashed Jean a smile, feeling worlds better than he had earlier. How nice it was to be able to escape his life at home, he wished Jean could know how much he truly meant to him.  

 

* * *

 

Several beers and rounds of MarioKart later Marco raised his arms in victory, his shirt rising up as well to expose the giant purple bruise on his hip. Being drunk had made him forget all about hiding his body, and Jean spotted the mark almost instantly. “What the hell happened to you?” he asked, placing his controller aside.

 

Marco looked away, unable to think of a reasonable excuse in his current state of inebriety. “My father happened.” He said quietly, too ashamed to make eye contact with Jean.

 

Jean’s temper flared. How dare someone hurt someone as gentle and kind as Marco, especially his own flesh and blood. “Fuck Marco...I’m so sorry. Do you need ice? I have plenty in the freezer.” Jean’s hand moved to lift up his friend’s shirt, surveying the nasty bruise once more.

 

Marco shook his head, grabbing Jean’s wrist and pulling it away, not wanting him to see just how badly he was injured.

 

“I don’t want your pity...I don’t want you to think of me any differently.” Marco began, swallowing hard before continuing. “Meeting you has made everything so much better, I don’t want you to treat me differently now. College was so lonely before you, but I want to get a degree...get a good job, and move far away from here. I don’t want my dad holding me back anymore.” Marco said quietly, his eyes downcast and burdened with sorrow. It wasn’t something he told many people, but he had never felt as comfortable around someone as he did with Jean. Ridiculously, hot-headed, beautiful Jean, who meant more to him than he could really put into words. “I’m sorry for opening the emotional floodgates...It’s just that I -”

 

“Your Dad’s a fucking asshole, and don’t ever apologize for talking to me about yourself Marco. I’m horrible at showing it but...I care…I do. Ever since we ran into each other before environmental science that day.” Jean paused, realizing now that he had probably gotten way ahead of himself. Marco didn’t want his pity and he most likely didn’t care care. Marco was intelligent and kind and perfect in all the ways Jean seemed to fail, hearing all this bullshit would probably make him feel worse. “You’re my best friend...my only friend really, and I sort of just want to lose myself in you”

 

Marco’s hand gently closed around Jean’s, causing them to both meet each other’s gaze. “Jean...you realize I like you quite a lot more than just a friend...right?”  Jean could feel the slight tremor in the other boy’s hand - he was nervous...this was genuine.

 

Jean couldn’t help but smile softly, squeezing Marco’s hand before bringing it to his lips and placing a small kiss on his knuckles. “I...like you more than just a friend as well...I just wasn’t sure if you felt the same. Didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable, didn’t want to fuck this all up.”

 

Marco was pretty sure he’d never blushed this hard in his life. “I don’t think you could mess this up if you tried Jean. It sounds really stupid but, I felt a really strong connection to you from the start. Sort of like we had met before.” He shook his head, laughing softly under his breath, “It sounds even more stupid when you say it out loud, don’t pay any attention to me, I’m just tired and emotional.”

 

“No...I felt it too, I understand. I don’t have the slightest damn clue as to what it is but...I’m just really glad I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going..” He smiled a little bashfully, gently letting go of Marco’s hand

 

_“I love you, I’ve loved you for so long and I just can’t keep it inside any more. Not with the dangers we face...not with the fact that I could lose you at any moment. To die without you knowing how I feel...I just can’t let that happen.” Marco stood rigid, his eyes focused intently on Jean’s face under the moonlight. Another sleepless night, another walk around the training grounds, but tonight was different in almost every way. Jean’s heart began to race with each and every word that slipped out of Marco’s mouth. He’d known how he felt ages ago, but had been too afraid of what people might think to act upon it. When he and Marco joined the Military Police, there would be plenty of time for them to talk about these things. Training was difficult, they needed to keep their heads nice and clear._

_But now this was happening and Jean didn’t exactly have very much control on the situation. Marco had taken the reigns and it was pretty much now or never. Jean knew how he felt, he knew he returned Marco’s feelings, so why was it so damn hard to just let it go. He looked up at Marco, stunned for just a moment before giving into intuition. His voice only trembled slightly as he spoke, “I..I love you too Marco. I have for a while, and it’s been absolutely fucking terrifying me. I never really figured I was meant to be loved and I honestly don’t even know how to go about loving someone. I’ll only disappoint you.”_

_And that’s when Marco stepped closer, his fingers gently tucking under Jean’s chin and lifting slightly, that sweet smile gracing his features. “You always sell yourself short Jean...you’re wonderful, and I don’t want you to do a single thing differently. I’ve fallen for you the way you are...I don’t need to be loved in return...just let me show you the love you deserve, that’s all I really want.”  He then slid his hand from Jean’s chin down to his hand, gently squeezing it, “Let’s get back to bed...busy day tomorrow, as always. And something tells me I’ll sleep well now.”_

_Jean smiles softly, looking down at their joined hands as a blush crept across his cheeks. Thank goodness for the darkness. “Yeah.” he sighed, keeping hold of Marco’s hand as they walked back to the barracks. Jean was thankful that the exchange had ended there. Not only was it late, and it was getting harder and harder to think, but he really had no idea how to react to a situation like this. He was completely out of his league. There was plenty of time to figure this all out after all._

_When they arrived, both boys quietly slipped into Marco’s bed,  Jean curling close as his companion lovingly wrapped his arms around him. “Goodnight Jean, sweet dreams.”_

_and both boys dreamed sweetly indeed._

 

Jean leaned in, pressing a small kiss to the end of Marco’s nose. He could feel the buzz of the alcohol, but was confident that he’d want this just as badly sober. Marco was special, and the fact that he hadn’t been able to tell just how much his best friend was hurting made him a bit sad. He needed to make it up to him. He wanted to make it better.

 

He pressed a hand against Marco’s stomach, earning a soft sigh from the other. Marco looked up at him, his cheeks tinged pink as Jean slowly slid his hand underneath his shirt, gently caressing the skin just to the side of his navel. “Show me where it hurts.” Jean whispered, leaning in to softly press a kiss to  Marco’s lips.

 

Marco obliged, becoming putty in Jean’s hands as the other boy rubbed soothing circles against his bruises. He kissed back softly, parting his lips to let the other boy in. It hurt a bit, but his head was foggy from being drunk on both alcohol and Jean. Marco lifted up his shirt, exposing the rest of his injured torso, where bruises of various sizes, shapes and colors adorned his skin.

 

Jean’s breath hitched, partially in anger, but he was too enamoured with his current company to feel the amount of rage he usually experienced. He leaned forward, pressing soft kisses to each and every single bruise, giving each mark a new meaning entirely. “Stay with me, I don’t want him to hurt you.” Jean spoke, his lips still gently grazing over the soft skin of Marco’s stomach.

 

Marco could only manage a nod, swallowing hard before pulling Jean up to him and kissing him lovingly. This was everything he had ever wanted, and he wouldn’t have to go home tonight. He could stay with Jean, he could be safe, and most of all - he’d be happy.

 

The early morning sun woke Jean up. He couldn’t remember falling asleep, but he somehow ended carefully curled up next to Marco on the floor of his apartment. At some point pillows and blankets had been retrieved from his bedroom and a cozy temporary bed had been fashioned. Marco was still sleeping peacefully, and Jean couldn’t help but smile as he watched over the other boy. His friend was definitely one of the most adorable people he had ever met, and he felt a flash of excitement at their current situation. Marco liked him, really liked him, and that made Jean happier than he had ever been.

 

* * *

 

Marco wished he could stay longer, but knew he needed to get home and tell his father where he had been. Not doing so would result in an even worse beating, though he was a little nervous about the beating he was going to get regardless. He stepped into the house, the lights were dim. Great, maybe he father was asleep.

 

“Where the fuck were you last night?” His father’s voice came from the living room. Marco bit his lip, stepping into the room and looking down at the floor in shame. Damn it.

 

It was better to be honest, right? “I spent the night at my friend’s house...I..um...like him, a lot...we ah...sort of have a thing. I’ll stay with him from now on if you’d lik-”

 

His father’s fist connects with his cheekbone and he’s pretty sure he sees stars. All he can manage to do is stumble backwards and brace himself for another flurry of punches, which comes without question. A black eye? wonderful. He hopes his makeup skills are as good as he thinks they are as his father shoves him to the ground, kicking him once in the gut before turning away in disgust. “I didn’t raise no faggot, you better fix yourself son, or I’ll do it for you.”

 

It takes everything Marco has in him not to burst into tears, but he manages, because he has to. This is wrong, so very wrong. His own flesh and blood beating him to a bloody pulp because he fell in love with a boy. What a fucked up world this was. A few more kicks and he’s curled into a ball, his father is now retreating to his room, beer in hand. His ribs and face are sore, and his heart is broken yet again. Why his father can’t love him, he’ll never know.

 

After a while he manages to stand up and heads to his room, packing up a small bag of his belongings before fleeing the horrid place with no particular destination in mind. Anywhere is better than his stupid house. And it’s just as he steps outside, into the fresh air, that he’s slammed into the ground by someone much bigger than him.

 

“You’re ol’ man called us and told us everything, fag. Said he needed help fixin’ you. Wouldn’t it be a shame if you just when missin’? Nobody would come to look for you I bet. Nobody would want a stupid little faggot like you.” Marco felt the tears sting in his eyes as pain shot through his back. His father’s friends had come to finish what he had started, and it didn’t look like they would be even remotely merciful.

 

“Please, just let me go. I’ll run far away, y-you’ll never hear from me again.” Marco pleaded, feeling as weak as ever as his voice trembled with fear. These men could kill him, and nobody would really be able to do much about it. They’d make it look like an accident, and that’d be it. He didn’t want to die, not now that he had Jean. Not now that he had something to live for. He had a dream and someone he loved with all his heart. He wanted to live another day, to live for another chance to tell Jean how much he loved him.  

 

But as one of the men grabbed him by the wrists, pushing the cold steel of a sharp blade against his throat, he was quite certain that wasn’t going to happen. Life had never really been fair to Marco, why should it start now. He cried out in pain as the knife bit into his skin. “P-Please, don’t do this. I don’t want to die. please..please let me go.” Marco muttered quietly as tears spilled down his face. This was cruel...if only this had happened a month or two ago, he’d never known Jean. He’d never have known just how happy he could be. He’d never have known just how beautiful it was to see Jean smile. Now he had absolutely everything to lose.

 

_He wasn’t sure where everything had gone so horribly wrong. He was better than this, surely._

_Better than the fate he was about to endure as the titan gripped him tightly and lifted him from the ground. This world had always been cruel, but he never really believed it would end like this. In fear and pain and anguish and frustration from just how futile this whole battle seemed to be. Marco closed his eyes, pounding on the titan’s hand in frustration for a moment as the tears spilled down his face. This wasn’t how it was supposed to end._

_They were supposed to graduate. Alongside Jean, he was supposed to become one of the members of the military police. They were supposed to live happily ever after safely inside the walls, but that was slowly falling to pieces in front of his eyes. Now he could only hope that Jean was safe. His beloved Jean, the one boy that showed him just how wonderful this awful existence could be. Marco only wished he could tell the other boy he loved him once last time._

_The titan only managed to take a solid bite out of him before someone came zipping through on 3D maneuver gear. Whoever it was knew what they were doing when it came to fighting titans, but the pain and lack of focus told Marco he wasn’t going to last much longer regardless of the person’s efforts. The damage had been done, his fate had been sealed. This was over._

_As the titan fell, his released it’s grip on Marco, allowing him to be swiped out of the air by whoever had come to his rescue. The person was warm and familiar, their voice sparking something inside of Marco, but he had lost too much blood to be able to focus on anything besides keeping his breathing as steady as possible. They landed, the person gently cradling Marco to his chest. “No no, no, please, please don’t leave me, Marco I love you. Please stay with me, I’ll get you medical help, this is all going to be okay. Please let this be okay.”_

_It was Jean. Jean had somehow come to the rescue and was now holding Marco tightly against his chest, pleading to whatever gods might be listening “J-Jean.” The injured boy managed, pressing his ripped apart face into Jean’s chest. He knew it was too late, but spending his last moments with the boy he loved was really all he could ask for. “Y-you’re here.”_

_“Of course I am, I’m here and everything is going to be fine. We’ll get you help and patch you up and we’ll both graduate and join the military police, just like we dreamed of.” Jean was crying, Marco could hear it in his voice. No matter how much both of them wished the situation was different, both knew neither of them were going to achieve their dreams now._

_“Jean...I love you...I always will. Be good. For me.” Marco whispered quietly, looking up at the boy holding him but finding himself unable to focus on anything in particular. The world was becoming a haze as he slowly slipped away. “I love you I love you.” Marco repeated, each confession of affection becoming a little more quiet as his breathing slowed._

_Jean could only hold onto the boy that meant the world to him, tears quietly streaming down his face. “I love you too, Marco. Forever and always.”  He placed a kiss to Marco’s forehead, but he was already gone._

 

“Marco!! Marco dammit, be okay. Please be fucking okay I can’t lose you I just fucking can’t.” Marco groaned softly, his hands pressing tightly into knife wound in his stomach, trying his hardest to stop the bleeding. Jean was here. Beautiful perfect Jean was here to make everything better, he wasn’t sure his heart had ever been this full of joy.

 

His head was pounding and for some reason he didn’t have the energy to open his mouth to speak. The ground around him felt wet and slick, blood most likely. Those bastards had managed get a few good stabs in. He smiled dreamily up at the boy holding him tightly, “Jean, y-you’re here” he managed, his voice barely a whisper. And that was all he was able to accomplish before falling into unconsciousness again.

 

“Of course I am you dumbass, please wake up. Please don’t leave me.” Jean panicked. He had already dialed 911 and was waiting for the ambulance to arrive. Marco needed medical attention now, and he cursed the emergency authorities with every horrible word he could think of for taking so long. How dare they make his Marco wait like this. He had removed his jacket and wrapped it tightly around the stab wounds on his precious friend’s torso, trying his hardest to stop the bleeding while he waited. Though his effort was quite futile. Whoever had done this to Marco had been intending to kill.

 

The ambulance arrived not too much later, carrying both boys to the hospital.

 

_Jean pressed his face into Marco’s pillow, tears spilling from his eyes. It smelled so much like the boy he had loved here, a small reminder of just how much he had lost. Marco would never rest here again. He’d never wake up in the middle of the night to go on walks when Jean couldn’t sleep. He’d never smile sleepily up at him in the morning when it was time to wake. He’d never hold his hand or kiss his brow or hold him close. He was dead. Gone forever, and it hurt Jean more than he could understand._

_He felt as though his heart had been ripped out, and made no secret of his quiet sobs that made their way through the night. A few of the other boys in the barracks could hear him, but they knew he was grieving and decided not to make a big deal out of it. Marco had been a friend to all, and a few of the other trainees had taken the news of his death pretty hard. Though nobody could compare to Jean._

_Jean’s sobs eventually slowed and his breathing evened. He fell into slumber, dreaming of Marco and the love that they had shared._

_““Jean...I love you...I always will. Be good. For me.”_

_“I will Marco, I promise.”_

 

Marco woke up to a white room, the lights blinding his exhausted eyes. He laid still as he quickly came to, surveying the situation while he tried to keep as calm as possible. Panicking right now would do nothing but injure him more. This was the hospital, and someone was holding his hand. He turned his head as much as he could, peering down the bed and to the boy sitting at his side. Jean was sleeping quietly. His fingers entwined with Marco’s as he head rested gingerly on the side of the bed. Marco smiled, he was alive. This was real. Jean had saved him.

 

Though it hurt, he brought his free hand around to gently run through Jean’s hair. The other boy blinked awake, breathing a sigh of relief to see the other was alright. “Marco...thank fucking god. You’ve been out for a few days...lost a lot of blood. I’ve been so worried.” Jean sat up, scooting a little closer and holding Marco’s hand with both of his own.

 

“How did you find me?” Marco said quietly, “How did you know I needed you?”

 

“I, I don’t know.” Jean shook his head. He had just felt an absolutely powerful push in the direction that had taken him to where Marco had been injured. Like fate had pulled them together in Marco’s time of need. It sounded fucking stupid and Jean didn’t really want to admit that it had happened. Paranormal shit was just stupid and he’d like to think his excellent intuition had been what saved the day, but something deep down inside of him knew otherwise. “I just knew. I can’t explain it. I could just tell that you needed me.”

 

“Well...thank you. You saved my life Jean. I owe you everything.”

 

“Nah...you don’t. Just give me your love, and I’ll be perfectly happy. Deal?”

 

“Deal.”

* * *

 

The sunlight peeked through the small cracks in the blinds, causing Jean to wake. The heavy weight on his chest snored softly into his skin causing a smile to spread across his face. He gently grazed a finger down Marco’s bare shoulder, placing a kiss to the top of his head. He was a heavy sleeper and didn’t wake, so Jean took the opportunity to admire how beautiful the sleeping boy was.

 

The bruises that had adorned his delicate skin where healing up nicely, and he knew the cuts and stabs from the attack would heal into scars soon enough. Marco hated them, said they made him look ugly, but Jean insisted that nothing could ever accomplish that feat. You’re beautiful, he would say, kissing his freckled cheeks.

 

You’re absolutely beautiful.

 

And for the first time, Marco felt invincible.

  
  
  



End file.
